1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
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