my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
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dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
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did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
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