I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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