So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
