Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
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