I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
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