why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
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Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
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