Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
Randomize
