he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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