I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
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