i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Randomize
