I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
