remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Randomize