If that was your dad, he is hot
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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