this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Just took my morning after pill in the library
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize