Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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