i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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