how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
