I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
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