after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
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