everyone is single if you try hard enough
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Randomize