Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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