I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
