Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
