bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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