just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
You know the @ sign on twitter? i wish there was one of those in real life so that the smokin' hot guy at the bar would know the slutty unbuttoning of my shirt was directed @ him, not @ his friend who looks like Mickey Rourke post-face melting
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
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