on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
