I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Randomize
