omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
I party with great urgency now.
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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