I will die if light touches me.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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