I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize
