He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
party gras won. party gras always wins.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
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