oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Im part way to drunk.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
