goodnight i made you a song goodbye
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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