I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
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