So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
