on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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