OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize