dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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