I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
