Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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