Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
