real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize
