you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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