you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
