im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
