even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize
