But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
This is my gift to your gina
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize