YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Randomize
