My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize