He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
