My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
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