worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
